just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??