Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
