out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
