Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
