Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
