Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
