He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
and she was petting her beer can
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Someone shattered a urinal.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
