I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
