i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just googled if crying burns calories
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level