a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Randomize
