i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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