if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
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