hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
