Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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