Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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