I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize