Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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