I cut my penus on the lid.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
