who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
