oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I smell like Dick and happiness
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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