So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
