Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
