It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize