i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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