I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
