Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on

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  (630): i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on http://tfl.nu/rm4w
  Replies (17) Good night (5332) Bad night (996)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.

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  (402): Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples. http://tfl.nu/nrga
  Replies (5) Good night (1179) Bad night (2311)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.

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  (701): so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick. http://tfl.nu/5ub0
  Replies (12) Good night (3846) Bad night (857)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.

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  (501): I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please. http://tfl.nu/vb3l
  Replies (9) Good night (4500) Bad night (1050)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.

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  (313): Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck. http://tfl.nu/ib4p
  Replies (4) Good night (2127) Bad night (1500)
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  (518): View more from New York

  He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.

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  (518): He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary. http://tfl.nu/x9c1
  Replies (10) Good night (1515) Bad night (754)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.

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  (256): I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies. http://tfl.nu/fekw
  Replies (4) Good night (582) Bad night (1166)
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  (831): View more from California

  YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.

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  (831): YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL. http://tfl.nu/sk5h
  Replies (21) Good night (1734) Bad night (711)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home

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  (360): well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home http://tfl.nu/1sb0
  Replies (8) Good night (2785) Bad night (667)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands

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  (845): Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands http://tfl.nu/8ta4
  Replies (6) Good night (1386) Bad night (399)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.

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  (720): hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now. http://tfl.nu/pc1n
  Replies (8) Good night (1515) Bad night (401)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.

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  (317): This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me. http://tfl.nu/qrey
  Replies (3) Good night (869) Bad night (355)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move

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  (727): I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move http://tfl.nu/nqhs
  Replies (3) Good night (463) Bad night (222)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club

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  (727): I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club http://tfl.nu/x5dg
  Replies (5) Good night (746) Bad night (215)
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  (315): View more from New York

  she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore

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  (315): she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore http://tfl.nu/sa4k
  Replies (5) Good night (323) Bad night (717)

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