do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
