he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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