One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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