In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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