a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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