a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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