Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
