One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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