I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
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