dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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