Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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