I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize