All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
