laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
i need some magic done to my vagina
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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