Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
