We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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