Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
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