If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
