i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
