I hate all girls vehemently.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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