tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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