just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
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