I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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