She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
