How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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