Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
