he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize